We choose a church based on how well we connect with the people. We like the worship style. The schedule is good for us. Our kids really love it. But one major factor in choosing a church is how we relate to the lead pastor and to the vision he casts for the church. So when that changes, when the pastor leaves our church, we are not always sure what to do next.
Reality Check
One word of reality here: Leaders effect change, so when a pastor comes or goes, you can be sure that change is coming too. The new pastor is not the former pastor. He cannot be and should not be. In God’s sovereign purpose, He believed the church (and you, by the way) needed a different kind of leader for the future. Each pastor has unique skills, priorities, and perspectives on life and ministry. He will lead out of those not because he has an agenda, but because that is who God has made him to be.
Pastors Leave
Pastors leave the church for a variety of reasons. Despite what may top the news feed, most pastors leave their current assignment to follow God’s call to a new place of ministry. It is a healthy transition that honors the Lord and His people, and advances the Kingdom. Sometimes, a pastor leaves under difficult circumstances. He may have broken trust in a way that disqualifies him from leading, he may have been on the weak end of a political power play with other church leaders, or he may have just burned out.
So what do we do when we have been left behind? Consider these five first moves when your pastor moves on:
Show grace to your pastor.
You may be surprised, confused, or even angry, but the man who is leaving is the same man who has loved you, served you, and led you as your pastor. God is at still at work in his life and in his family, and he is adjusting his life according to the will of God. He has given himself for you in good times and bad. Now it is your turn to show grace. Celebrate his ministry. Show love to his family. Pray for his future. And continue to be his friend.
Speak life to your church family.
Grieve the loss of your pastor, but use your words to remind your friends that Jesus did not leave when your pastor did. Your pastor and the church family need to hear that God loves them, you love them, and that you know God is working in all these circumstances for His glory and their good. Practice these words from Paul to the Ephesian church:
Let no unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building up the one in need and bringing grace to those who listen. (Ephesians 4:29)
Stress has a way of exaggerating how people hear our words. So be careful to use your conversation to encourage your friends and to build up the body of Christ.
Get comfortable with uncertainty.
A lot of things change when a pastor leaves, so get comfortable with not knowing what is next. And then focus on what you do know. You know Jesus is alive and the Gospel is the power of God of salvation for those who believe (Romans 1:16). You know that Jesus builds His church. And you know that God is faithful to His promises.
Beyond that, you know the church will meet on Sunday, that you have friends that love you, and that the situation today is not forever. So loosen up. Everything is not clear, but clarity is not the source of our joy. Jesus is. Our attempt to manage every unknown variable can cause us to miss our best opportunity to trust God. And not trusting God is much worse than not knowing what He is doing.
Roll up your sleeves and get to work.
Leaders make a difference which means the absence of leaders makes a difference. But the health of a church is revealed when key leaders leave. When your pastor moves on, do your part to step up. If you teach children, keep doing that. If you help underprivileged people, stay engaged in that ministry. If you are in a leadership role, fulfill your calling with character and conviction. And keep giving your tithes and offerings generously and sacrificially.
The loss of a leader creates new challenges for the entire church family. Your faithfulness will fill in the gaps and remind everyone else that the mission is still worth your life.
Play by the rules.
A vacuum of leadership tempts people to ignore governing documents and organizational standards already in place. Sometimes panic takes over, and other times the culprit is pride. But the church’s shared commitment to play by the rules will strengthen relationships, advance the mission in the community, and prepare the church to follow the next pastor.
No playbooks are perfect, and when a pastor leaves, the imperfections are glaring. But resist the temptation to correct everything that is wrong. There will be time for that later. Instead, build trust by serving well within existing systems. Honor the people who are in roles of responsibility by supporting them, serving them, and praying for them.
The Finish
It is likely that your pastor made a big difference in your life. You learned to love God by watching him love God. He may have baptized you or officiated your wedding. You may have told him things you told no one else. He may have preached your mother’s funeral. Seeing him leave should be difficult, but God has a habit of moving leaders in and out of our lives. So thank God for the last season of ministry, be faithful in this season of change, and then be ready to join His work for the next.
