I grew up when the sitcoms Silver Spoons and Different Strokes were big. And I confess that I even watched reruns of The Brady Bunch after school. In each instance, affluence was a way of life. And in the 80’s there was just the assumption of future wealth. The expectations were clear: success will be measured by one’s financial prosperity.
Now as dads chase silver spoons, too often we lead our kids into the spiritual soup kitchens.
Solomon had achieved a wealth that became famous. In 1 Kings 10 the Queen of Sheba visited Solomon and was overwhelmed by Solomon’s wisdom and wealth. She said that not the half had been told to her. Solomon’s wealth exceeded all of her expectations.
Men love the idea of impressing others with our prosperity. We will work our fingers to the bone and run our families into the ground if it means we will receive the applause of our peers for our financial success.
Let’s be clear. Wealth is not prohibited in Scripture. Many of God’s best men were men of wealth. However, the Bible is full of warnings to the wealthy. In Luke 18:25, Jesus said it was easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of heaven. James 1:11 encourages the rich man to humble himself because he will soon pass away.
This is not difficult to understand. With more money comes greater temptation. Do we need to list the all-star athletes and pop stars who have been ruined by their inability to handle money?
So how does a dad provide for his family without being consumed with the pursuit of money?
Meet needs.
Many dads (and moms) are missing in action parents because they are working extra hours not to provide housing and food, but to have newer stuff or bigger vacations. So our children learn quickly that things are more valuable than relationships.
Live to give.
We like to collect stuff, but the essence of the Gospel is generosity. Jesus “gave Himself as a ransom for many”—1 Timothy 2:6. Unfortunately, we have taught our kids to expect to receive rather than to live to give.
Train hearts.
One of the greatest experiences of my life was working a part-time job in high school. So there is something very good about teaching our kids to work hard and manage their money. But too often teenagers are going to school and then working 30-40 hours a week…not to learn responsibility or a work ethic, but to buy more stuff. As a result, dads and their sons and daughters are isolated during the most formative parenting years of a kid’s life. Instead of taking the time to train the heart of our kids, we are pushing them to build a bank account.
Trust Jesus.
Money is a blessing from the Lord. Some of the godliest people I know are very good with their money. But then there are people who manage their money well, but they do it with a bad attitude. Their identity is in their financial position rather than in Christ. So when money is tight their attitude stinks and their home becomes an unhappy place.
Solomon had a lot of cash and found great pleasure in the options money gave to him. But although he put silver spoons in the mouths of his kids, his love of money landed his family in the spiritual soup kitchen.
While we pursue the American dream, we create a nightmare for our kids. It just doesn’t have to be that way. So work hard, trust Jesus, and let’s give our kids God’s best.
More from the Dadhood Series to come. As always, your comments are welcome.
Such a slippery slope we go down when we chase after the comforts in life. Dad has to work hard, not to earn “extra” but just to stay current in his technology/field to assure he can keep a place in the workforce, therefore taking care of his family. I am fortunate to have a husband that agrees we can forgo some “extras” in life in order for me to be home with our children.
Kids today are all about “gimme this, gimme that.” How do we change this? It’s hard when we have actually been the ones to initiate this bad behavior by giving them rewards when reward is not really in order.
How to teach that money in this life is not the reward to be sought after- but the reward of a crown of glory in the next life?
Good word, Scarlett.