Leading a church is hard, messy work, and there few classes or conferences that can adequately prepare a pastor to shepherd a local congregation. Some leadership skills are intuitive, some are learned by observation, but most are only developed through experience. The experience that makes a pastor, however, can also be the experience that breaks a pastor and even wounds a congregation.

So as we shepherd our congregations, lead our ministry teams, and grow as a leader, here are ten common pitfalls to avoid:

#1 –Expecting trust before earning it

A seasoned pastor once told me, “Your people won’t trust you until they can trust you.” Because of our position, our congregation will often comply with our leadership efforts. So many pastors settle for mere compliance as long as goals are accomplished. We tend to value the mission of the church more than the church of the mission. As a result, we are quick to expect trust, but we are hesitant to invest the time and energy to build it. We, therefore, lack the relational equity necessary to move people from compliance to enthusiastic confidence.

The gap between compliance and confidence in the early months and even short years of a pastor’s tenure is expected, but when that gap remains or even grows over time, the pastor’s effectiveness deteriorates. If we are wise, however, we will show genuine appreciation for who the people are more than what they can do for us. We will listen to their stories, we will ask probing questions, we will respect their journey, and then we will serve them faithfully where they are before asking them to continue their journey with us.

#2 – Promoting personal preference as God’s will

Churches can lose their way, neglect Jesus’ Great Commission, and turn church life into something it was never meant to be. So pastors shepherd the congregation back to God and to His mission in the world. But churches are as unique as fingerprints. Their distinct history, personality, local culture, and organizational structure influence how prepared they are to take their next step in God’s mission.

So when a pastor joins an established church, we are joining what God is already doing. The pitfall for us is to assume that we are in some way bringing Jesus with us to the new church, and that our preferred brand or philosophy of ministry must be the will of God for this congregation just like it was for our last one. Rather than being called to a local church, we see ourselves as a called to a task that must be accomplished in the way that is most familiar to us. We view the will of God only through our prism of experience and preferences.

God calls pastors and churches, however, to seek the will and the ways of God together. Pastors are leaders and should bring that leadership to bear in the life of the congregation, but we can never promote our preferences as God’s will anymore than church members can claim their preferences as God’s will until we seek the Lord together, reason together, recognize the will of God together, and then chart a course together that advances His Kingdom.

#3 – Ignoring tested processes in favor of easier ones

Churches are often clumsy. There, I said it. Structures and processes can become antiquated and actually distract from the mission. Church vitality and growth require healthier, simpler, and more agile decision-making processes.

Those clumsy systems and structures, however, are there for a reason. It may not be a good reason at this point, but somewhere along the way someone thought it was a good idea. And that someone may still be around and may still think it’s a good idea.

So here’s the thing: shepherding a church requires a measure of artistry. It is said of David that he shepherded his people with integrity of heart and skill of hand (Psalm 78:72). This is not manipulation, politics, or trickery. It is common kindness that values people enough to listen, understand, show patience, and then work for common ground. We change what we can when we can, but we discern the seasons to know when we shouldn’t. It is harder work and it challenges our leadership skills, but if building up people to join the mission of God is our goal, it is much better work in the end.

#4 – Treating every setback as a spiritual crisis

Pastors lead with vision and courage. We seek the Lord, build consensus, and then make the best decisions we can with the information we have. But after praying, planning, and then working the plan, things do not always go as expected. Maybe the congregation did not eagerly respond. Maybe trusted volunteers did not follow through. Maybe the financial plan fell short.

There are many reasons our efforts fail, but we may be tempted to think that each setback must be the result of spiritual disobedience or apathy in the life of the congregation. We may even take the setback as a personal attack on our call from God or as a rejection of our vision. That may not be the case. As pastors, we should consider the possibility that our efforts failed because we made mistakes. It’s possible that we did not plan, train, or communicate well. It’s also possible that our plan was good, but our timing was bad. And it’s possible that although we meant well, we actually missed God.

While we want to see progress, the setbacks we experience may be the good grace of God to protect the congregation and us from unforeseen danger. It could be that God is working in a different way. Perhaps He is growing us, perhaps He is preparing our people, and perhaps He is doing something we cannot yet imagine. And even if the resistance to our efforts is due to spiritual rebellion, God is sovereign over that too, which means the setback is not a crisis in heaven at all.

Shepherding the congregation through setbacks is a spiritual discipline of grace designed by God to increase our capacity to trust Him and an opportunity to show others the grace we have been given.

#5 – Missing the opportunity to apologize

The Bible is without error. Pastors are not. And everyone in the congregation knows both of those things are true. Leaders are in the middle of the action, but we do not always see clearly. We do not always think rightly. Our job is a job of words, and when there are many words, there are many opportunities to offend (Proverbs 10:19). We do not always do the right thing in the right way at the right time.

As much as pastors want to help people, sometimes we hurt people. It’s not intentional, but the pain of an accident still hurts. So when a wise pastor hurts someone, he empathizes and then he apologizes. We do not have to compromise biblical convictions to say, “I’m sorry.” What we do have to do is to consider others more highly than ourselves.

A sincere apology, then, has a way of galvanizing our relationships and actually advancing our ability to lead. It is not a sign of weakness. Our congregation knows we are human, but an apology demonstrates that we are also humble. It shows that we care more about people than our position. It shows that we are willing to step back in order to build up others. And in the end, the people we build up become our most loyal partners in ministry.

Education, experience, vision, and leadership skills are simply not enough to lead a church. When God calls a pastor to lead a congregation, His first priority for that pastor is not greater influence. God’s first priority for the pastor is greater intimacy with Him that is developed as the pastor depends fully on the Holy Spirit to work through him to shepherd God’s people. Every pastor will stumble into these pitfalls from time to time, but walking humbly with our God means stumbling less and less.

(Stayed tuned for Part 2 coming soon.)